Up until the last 50 seconds of last night’s 101-98 win over the New Jersey Nets, the Miami Heat were flat out refusing to give a single fuck. Oh they had fucks. Had them stored away somewhere. Perhaps in a box inside a FedEx truck marked “playoffs.” But they just…
The Miami Heat went into Madison Square Garden yesterday for the first and only time this regular season, and proceeded to mash the spleens of the New York Knickerbockers to the tune of 93-85, snapping New York’s nine-game home-winning streak, sweeping the season series against the Knicks and taking the…
Holy shit bananas, that was rough.The Miami Heat dropped a gut-wrenching loss to the Chicago Bulls 96-86 in overtime last night.And while the game is meaningless in terms of overall playoff importance, it still feels like Heat fans got their collective cocks slammed in a Metrobus door. WILL SOMEONE START…
Did you guys hear the Florida Panthers are in the Stanley Cup Playoffs? You guys heard of the Florida Panthers? You guys even heard of hockey?No? Well, great, this guide is for you. Being native Floridians we’re glad that our team has finally broken their playoff slump. We’d like to…
Well, at least some people think Isiah Thomas was a good basketball coach.The former NBA All-Star and failed New York Knicks coach last week was fired as head coach of Florida International University’s men’s basketball team. His players staged a walkout during an awards banquet, and now some of them want…
Anyone familiar with Miami wasn’t surprised that Marlins manager Ozzie Guillen’s comments about Fidel Castro set off a fire storm. But certain folks in the sports world were off on the sidelines scratching their heads or muttering things about how baseball managers aren’t diplomats. Some are even defending Guillen. That…
LeBron James scored a game-high 36 points last night, while the rest of the Miami Heat stood and watched as the Boston Celtics shot 60 percent from the floor in yet another listless-shit-the-bed-let’s-all-go-outside-and-punt-a-litter-of-kittens-loss by the Heat.Rajon Rondo once again had his way against the Heat defense, dishing out 18 assists…
For months, anyone writing about the Marlins’ new ballpark has had to mention the catastrophe sure to ensue whenever 37,000 fans descend on Little Havana’s tiny side streets, only to find that Miami’s finest civil engineers included only 5,000 new parking spots. But how bad would it really be? There was only…
Ozzie Guillen has only spent five games as the Miami Marlins’ manager, and he’ll spend the next five at home. The team has announced that Guillen will be suspended for the next five games following the controversial remarks he made about Fidel Castro.Update: We have live coverage of the press…
With two national championships and a Christian morals poster boy in Tim Tebow, it’s easy to look at Urban Meyer’s reign with the University of Florida Gators as some sort of shining example of the best of college football.A new report from the Sporting News suggests otherwise. Former players says…
Ask your average American Joe about cricket, and he’ll picture noblemen, dressed in white livery, sipping cups of tea while a sickly servant polishes their finely carved bats. But a new lawsuit claims the state of cricket in the U.S. is anything but aristocratic. A Silicon Valley millionaire is now…
The Isiah Thomas era is officially over at FIU, and, well, the program still exists! So there’s something! Thomas’s stunt hiring didn’t irretrievably break the program. There’s still hope. Maybe FIU can hire some respected assistant from a larger program to help take the school to a new level. Or…
Isiah Thomas has been fired from his job as head basketball coach at Florida International University, according to a statement released by the school. The former NBA star and New York Knicks coach brought big hopes with him to the campus but failed to deliver…
Ozzie Guillen is officially all of Miami’s drunk uncle. He’s the kind of guy who just mutters and complains and yells at your bratty cousins during the day on family trips, and spends the nights getting drunk by himself at the hotel bar.No, really, that’s exactly who he is…
When it comes to big time sports, Miami is primarily a football team thanks to the long and proud histories of the Miami Dolphins and Hurricanes. Oddly, our football teams are stuck in sucksville at the moment, and just about every other major sports team in the region is giving…
The Miami Dolphins recently switched from Reebok to Nike uniforms, and the minimal changes unveiled earlier this week for the 2012 kits were mostly all in the details. Though, come 2013 the Dolphins uniform change may be a bit more drastic. The team is reportedly considering updating its logo. It’s…
Everybody can unclench their assholes now.The Miami Heat are fine.LeBron James decided to remind the world once again that he does, in fact, have the biggest dong of them all. Behind a 34 point, 10-assist performance, James led the Miami Heat to a 98-93 win over the Oklahoma City Thunder…
On the opening night of the Marlins new ballpark, a lot of things went right: Parking wasn’t a catastrophe. The weather was South Florida perfection. On national TV, the new ballpark looked damned gorgeous — lime green facades, swimming polls and all. And in the best news of the night,…
There are just so many bizarre features at the new Marlins Park that apparently we in the media haven’t been able to keep up with all the insanity. Like, did you even know that the stadium includes a Bobblehead Museum? Seriously, there are 588 different bobbleheads encased behind glass, and…
Weirdly enough, the Miami Heat only play like a bag of shit on the road, because they remain as dominant as ever at home. LeBron James dropped a season-high 41 points — 15 in the fourth quarter — as the Heat took down the Philadelphia 76ers 99-93 last night, winning their…
Two years ago, Barack Obama threw out the first pitch at the Washington National’s stadium to inaugurate the 2010 MLB season. The Marlins haven’t announced who will toss out the ceremonial first ball tonight. Could the president come running out of the brand-new bullpen?Today’s White House schedule ends at 11:55…
Move over, PETA — there’s a new publicity-hungry organization in town that isn’t afraid to shock. To protest hot dogs, the Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine, a group of vegan doctors, is unveiling a billboard linking hot dogs to “butt cancer” right outside the new Marlins Stadium…
