Marlins Manager Jack McKeon, in 400 Years of Baseball Cards

Trader Jack is back. They’ve taken him out of the mothballs and planted him back in the Marlins dugout, and he made a great stride forward by taking Hanley Ramirez out of the starting lineup as soon as he marched into town.Who is this guy? Where did he come from?…

Chad Pennington Joins Fox as NFL Analyst

Former Dolphins quarterback Chad Pennington isn’t ready to accept that his playing career is over just yet, but he’s already accepted a job on the other side. He’s just signed with Fox Sports to provide analysis during NFL football games. Though he still hopes to return to playing one day…

Jose Canseco Recruiting Former Juicers For Minor League Team

Former MLB all-star José Canseco, now the manager of an Arizona minor-league team, uses his Twitter account for a lot of things: proposing (repeatedly) to his girlfriend, complaining about his girlfriend, looking for new girlfriends.But on Thursday evening, right after he requested to trade an autographed bat for “2 or…

LeBron James’ Movie Debut Postponed Once Again

It looks like an Oscar will continue to elude LeBron James much like an NBA championship ring. The most hated man in sports has been attached to star in the Universal Studios production Ballers since 2009, but script delays have kept the project on the back burner. There were rumors…

South Florida Has A Winning Team: Men’s Beach Soccer

We get it already — the Heat lost. It was sad. But another team has been defending Miami’s honor, and these guys actually won a championship — Florida Beach Soccer FC, a five-man team of footballers with professional credentials who are now the North American Sand Soccer champions.It’s more serious…

Report: Erik Spoelstra’s Job is Safe

Oh, no, Spo’ won’t go. According to reports from The Boston Globe (of all papers), Miami Heat coach Erik Spoelstra’s job is safe for next year. Its sources also claim that at no point in the season was Spoelstra’s job ever in danger…

Stephen Colbert Bashes LeBron James

Everybody has an opinion about the Miami Heat’s loss, including Stephen Colbert. America’s favorite fake pundit took on LeBron James and the Miami Heat last night in his spor repor, explaining, “Everyone knew they were destined to win, and personally I’m offended they were forced to prove it by playing…

Las Vegas Odds Makers: Heat Favored to Win 2012 Finals

Let’s hope you didn’t burn any of your Miami Heat championship party decorations last night, because according to Las Vegas odds makers, Dwyane Wade and company are already the frontrunners for the 2012 finals. Apparently winning last night hasn’t made Dirk Nowitzki and his Dallas Mavericks favorites to repeat, and…

LeBron: Choke on This, Loser

“At the end of the day, all of the people that were rooting for me to fail, tomorrow they’ll have to wake up and have the same life that [they had] before they woke up today. They got the same personal problems they had today and I’m going to continue…

Hurricanes Have Eighth Best 2012 Recruiting Class, So Far

You know what we could use right now? Some positive sports news on this, the Miami sports fans’ somber morning of despair. Thankfully, things are looking up for that team that originally brought this town a boastful, brash, and talent-rich line up that inspired so, so much hatred. Yes, the…

Miami Heat vs. Dallas Mavericks NBA Finals Game 6: Kaput

​After winning Game 6 105-95, the Dallas Mavericks are NBA champions. Meanwhile, the Miami Heat is left with a shitload of questions, LeBron James will continue to be haunted by his finals failure, and Heat fans everywhere are walking around feeling like their favorite uncle just placed his wiener next…