Five Band Name Trends That Totally Suck

We’d say kids these don’t know how to name their bands properly, but kids (and, really, we mean grown men, sometimes zillionaires) have been coming up with crappy band names for quite some time now. And it’s only going to get worse. All you need is login info to be…

Kunafa: For Breakfast or Dessert?

Welcome to Short Order Show & Tell, where one of us brings a local delicacy to our weekly staff meeting and we all weigh in on its deliciousness.To kick things off, we begin with the humble Kunafa, a sweet-and-savory pastry from Oriental Bakery in Brickell…

Balare: Sex, Drugs, and Rock ‘n’ Roll Charter School Not First

Even if you like charter schools, and I do, you gotta admit that drunken dancing shouldn’t take place there at night.The new allegations reported by NBC and the Miami Herald that a nightclub was operating out of Balare Academy on Quail Roost Drive ain’t the first. Wild times and perversion are a…

Miami Needs a Great Breakfast Spot (Like O-B House in Fort Lauderdale)

​Miami has breakfast chains such as Denny’s, IHOP, and the like. We boast a few two-bit diners and coffee shops too, as well as fancy hotel establishments that offer ostentatious brunch buffets on weekends. Michael’s Genuine serves cool breakfast items on Sundays, as do perhaps a couple of other restaurants…

Corina Esquijarosa, North Bay Village Mayor, Could End Up in the Slammer

When it comes to North Bay Village Mayor Corina Esquijarosa, Miami-Dade State Attorney Katherine Fernandez Rundle should follow Monroe County’s lead. There should be no mercy for individuals who screw over their fellow taxpayers.On August 19, Florida Department of Law Enforcement Special Agent Vincent Weiner was arrested on misdemeanor charges of…

William Bryson, Miami-Dade’s New Fire Chief, Excluded Blacks

​When Miami-Dade Mayor Carlos Gimenez tapped one of his close confidantes to lead the county’s fire department, he ignored 29 other applicants to pick a guy who once booted African-Americans out of Miami’s fire union. No one was interviewed — not even Haitian-American Karls Paul-Noel, who was interim chief until…

Michelle Spence-Jones Proves the Mainstream Media Wrong

​Luther Campbell, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke gloats about the dropping of criminal charges against African-American Miami Commissioner Michelle Spence-Jones. When Michelle Spence-Jones was being…

Dear Ricardo Guerrero: Ten Reasons Why Miami Venues Don’t Suck Dick

​Recently, Crossfade covered local musician and promoter Ricardo Guerrero’s declaration that “Miami Venues Suck Dick.” The scintillating article managed to pile up a total of 117 comments. Some people agreed with Guerrero’s statement. Others tried to offer suggestions to grow this little scene. It’s a classic underground music fight, and…

Fashion Freakouts at the MTV Video Music Awards 2011

The 2011 MTV Video Music Awards show was packed full of “entertaining” surprises. It was revealed that Beyonce is preggers, Rick Ross paints quietly like Bob Ross, and Rebecca Black doesn’t know how to do the Dougie. Of course, the confounding fashion decisions were perhaps the most memorable part of…

North Bay Village Has A Possum Epidemic

​The morning of August 21, a pesky intruder found itself caged in the lush back yard of Richard Chervony’s three-bedroom residence in North Bay Village. Bearing its fangs and emitting a guttural growl, the creature spied Chervony with its black doll eyes. Its furry, salt-and-pepper body and bald, pink tail…