Remember when you used to spend all day playing arcade fighting games against your friends, and you had that one buddy who just kept pressing the same attack button, over and over, leaving you no time to gather your thoughts and use your actual skills? That shit was cheap as…
For half an hour this morning, North Miami Avenue — one of the city’s most crowded arteries — was shut down. By peacocks. For most of the show, it was funny, but not to the honking buses, swerving drivers, and cops who didn’t show up…
Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…
Everyone wants to feel special and loved, but not everyone is a Very Important Person. Of course, if VIP is really about anything at all, it’s money and status and exclusivity. A person cannot be “very important” unless there are “less important” people at which to snicker and point from…
Swimming With Sharks Expose the predators: Like many of the victims of sexual abuse by swim coaches you describe (“Underwater,” Deirdra Funcheon, June 5), I grew up swimming in South Florida and coached USS swim clubs in the Florida Gold Coast in the 1990s. As a coach I had very…
Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…
Last week, in game four of the NBA Eastern Conference Finals, LeBron James broke Michael Jordan’s playoff record for most games with at least 25 points, five rebounds, and five assists. It was another milestone for the Miami Heat superstar. As the Heat heads to the NBA Finals for the…
Punk Paradise Where everybody knows your name: Your oral history of Churchill’s Pub (“Bangers & Mosh,” Liz Tracy and S. Pajot, May 29) shows exactly why I’m hoping things stay as close to the way they are as possible even though founder Dave Daniels has sold the place. The few…
The Fontainebleau has crabs, and it’s exactly the type you’re thinking — king crab. These bad boys are the rulers of all crustaceans and an extreme delicacy not only in the States but also around the world. They make their way from the Nordic and Bering seas down to South…
A girl walks into a nut store, and it’s all it’s cracked up to be. I noticed Yossef Roasting Co. while cruising West Dixie Highway after visiting the neighboring Israeli deli, Etzel Itzik. Unfortunately, my first visit to this 4-month-old store was during Pesach (Passover), when most of the items…
Burger month is almost over, which means you need to consume as many burgers as possible by the week’s end. If that sounds difficult to do, don’t fret — Michael Mina 74 is setting out to make the task feasible. Not only did the restaurant roll out four burgers (one…
Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…
Let me get this straight. Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling is secretly recorded making bigoted comments about African-Americans, and he’s banned from the NBA for life. But his buddy and Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban admits he’s a bigot during an on-camera interview, and now African-American sports pundits such…
Gay Bullfights Barbarity equality: How charming that thanks to the burgeoning gay rodeo scene you profiled (“Steers & Queers,” Kyle Swenson, May 22) , the GLBT community can now enjoy abusing farm animals with the same barbaric gusto as the straight sadists! And women can now torture and kill bulls…
Ooohhh, Beliebers! We’ve spent oh-so-many long days, sweaty nights, and tween years just desperately dreaming about owning “the ultimate amazing one-of-a-kind unique Justin Bieber collectable!” Not his bowling ball from the “Baby” video. Not his favorite pimped-out sizzurp cup. And no, not even a lightly used deodorant stick. The Bieber…
Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke tells why LeBron James is better than Michael Jordan ever was. On Monday night, in game four of…
Some people become famous because they are incredible talents discovered at a young age. Others become famous because their parents treat the womb like a star factory. Hey, if you push enough kids into the spotlight, one of them is gonna have a hit. But when one kid becomes a…
Every boss has a favorite saying. But only the Bawse Rick Ross is so serious about the power of words that he gets a fave phrase tattooed on his face. Indeed … Over the holiday weekend, the man and mogul born William Leonard Roberts II commissioned California-based ink-and-needle artist Nikko…
Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke goes after Mark Cuban. Let me get this straight. Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling is secretly recorded…
Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…
The New York City Police Department should arrest Solange Knowles for assault and battery on Jay Z. But nothing will probably happen to her because there’s a double standard when a woman is the aggressor in a domestic violence case. Last week, TMZ published surveillance footage of Solange, Jay Z’s…
Randy Katz is a stand-up guy. An emergency room doc at Memorial Regional Hospital in Hollywood, he recently raised $35,000 for a buddy, Jeff Fogel, who has amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS) — Lou Gehrig’s disease. The money helped Fogel buy a high-tech wheelchair to deal with the malady that is…
