Reader Mail: Welfare Is a Ponzi Scheme

Gnarly Hustle The abyss of self: “American Hustle” (Jesse Marx and Allie Conti, May 15) is sad on so many levels. Andrea and Colin Chisholm, who claimed to be Scottish royalty, stole not only from welfare but also from the wellspring of character that is free for the taking. The…

Miley Cyrus Covers The Smiths: An Extremely Detailed Breakdown

Miley Cyrus and Morrissey are basically the same person. One is a lyrical genius shrouded in sexual mystery who speaks on behalf of intellectualism, animal rights, and sordid youths, defying borders and generations. The other is famous for a butt that resembles uncooked turkeys, being naked, and sticking her tongue…

Solange Knowles Should Be in Jail for Assaulting Jay Z

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke wants justice for men who are victims of domestic violence. The New York City Police Department should have…

25 Reasons Why It Sucks to Work in Food Service

Go to college, they said. It will open doors, they said. But after stepping across the stage with that liberal arts degree in hand, you soon find yourself walking into food service serfdom because you have virtually no choice and need to pay the bills. You’re serving food and drinks…

Mugshots Friday: Blond Ladies

Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…

Hadley Park Community Center Finally to Be Built

After 13 years of stalling, bureaucratic ineptitude, and political gamesmanship, Liberty City’s Hadley Park will finally get a $6.5 million community center. This historic 28-acre spot at NW 50th Street and 14th Avenue is one of the most infamous in Miami history. Thirty-five black families were ejected from the area…

Just Admit You’re Contributing to Racism

African-Americans in Miami don’t get a fair shot at anything. It’s sad when young black children can aspire to become president but they can forget about ever being elected mayor in their own hometown. No one wants to address the disenfranchisement of black people here. African-American contractors still receive fewer…

Reader Mail: Florida’s Guardian System Is Broken

Protectors or Predators? Elder abuse is everywhere: I’m glad you did an investigation into abuse in Florida’s underregulated guardianship industry (“Who’s Watching the Guardians?” Michael E. Miller, May 8) because elder abuse is rampant in the state. I have lived through it. I’m 73, and I was hospitalized almost two…

Rap and R&B’s Worst ’90s Ripoffs

The ’90s are back! The fashions, the music, the attitude. There are more people Rollerblading by the beach than we’ve seen in about 25 years. (Wow, it’s been too long!) Now, we couldn’t be more excited about the return of the most bleakly apathetic decade in pop culture. But along…

Miami-Dade Needs More Than a Panel to Fix Race Relations

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke explains what’s wrong with race relations in Miami-Dade. African-Americans in Miami don’t get a fair shot at anything…

Five Reasons Marco Rubio Isn’t Ready to Be President

Florida Senator Marco Rubio said yesterday in New Hampshire that he was ready to be president. Problem is the 43-year-old man who would be the first Hispanic big cheese doesn’t have the goods. Here are five reasons why: See also: Marco Rubio To Decide on Possible Presidential Run Next Year…

Mugshots Friday: Blurred Bynes

Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…

Donald Sterling Should Have Been Expelled Long Ago

Karma finally caught up to Donald Sterling, the slumlord owner of the Los Angeles Clippers. Just when his team is finally thriving and competing for an NBA championship, NBA commissioner Adam Silver last week banned him for life. But it’s sad the NBA didn’t boot Sterling, who was caught on…

Reader Mail: Divided on Obamacare

Obama Flair Answer this, Bippo: If Obamacare is so good (“The Health-Care Heist,” Chris Parker, May 1), why I am paying more than double with a bigger deductible from my previous plan, why did I have to change all the doctors (from primary to specialist), and why is my medical…

Adore Nightclub: A Photo Tour of Miami’s Vegas-Style Party Spot

“Luxurious. Sexy. Intimate.” That’s how Crossfade described Adoré when we interviewed owner and nightlife impresario, Cy Waits back in December. Now that we’ve experienced the club firsthand, we can say with certainty that Adoré is indeed everything that Waits described it to be, and more. From the moment that those…

Mugshots Friday: Twice in a Week?

Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…

Devonta Freeman Will Be an NFL Star

All his life, Devonta Freeman has been looking for a way out of the Pork ‘n’ Beans projects in Liberty City. When the former Miami Central High and Florida State University star running back was 13 years old, I coached him in Pop Warner games for the Liberty City Optimist…