Reader mail: “The only way Democrats can win is if they cheat”

Cellblock Strippers

Drug lord’s due: I’m all for your revelations that Miami’s downtown Federal Detention Center is overrun with strippers posing as paralegals to the numerous South American druglords inside (“Barely Paralegal,” Michael E. Miller, Dec. 1). If it’s just drug dealers getting the stripteases, then they have been wrongly imprisoned in the first place. That’s definitely a Miami special.

Tipmeformydance

Inquiring minds: I have one question: Is this work “pro bone-o”?

KINGAJAM 21

Lady lies: One attorney you interviewed said the strippers offended her because “This is still kind of a male-dominated profession.” No it isn’t. Sixty percent of all lawyers now are female. Feminists can say anything and be taken seriously, no matter how factually false it is.

Andrewronaldsmith

Old wisdom: As the saying goes, a lawyer will always f*#k you one way or another!

Warick1234

Sinful Santa

No crime there: Your story about Brian Shechtman, the longtime owner of Santa’s Enchanted Forest, offending a black limo worker with his attempted pickup lines about owning lots of “black” items (“Bad Santa,” Francisco Alvarado, Dec. 1) doesn’t show him being racist. If a black guy told a white girl he owned everything white, I’m sure there would be no problem. From all I can see, the only moral is that Shechtman should never be onstage at the Improv.

Marioc3

Ballot Shenanigans

Forget Florida: Uncle Luke’s column about how absentee fraud could swing Obama’s reelection campaign (“Luke’s Gospel: Will Miami absentee ballots elect Obama?”, Luther Campbell, Dec. 1) misses the larger point: If I was Obama, I would forget about Florida. We just voted for Rick Scott less than a year ago. Obama barely won here in 2008. Florida’s stupidity cannot be cured by God himself. We have had 16 years of Republican governors, Lord knows how many years of the state House and Senate being as red as a ruby. Why bother to win here? It’s an expensive money pit to win Florida. If you want to spend that kind of money, make a run for Texas. Focus on Ohio, Pennsylvania, North Carolina, and Virginia (since they also have a tossup Senate race there). But Florida? With all the fraud going on and Republican cronies up north, forget it. Let the Republicans waste their money and manpower here.

f b

Shady stance: I am having trouble connecting the headline about Obama with the article. Are you saying that Obama (or others supporting Obama) are likely to commit absentee ballot fraud, get caught, and thereby be derailed? Or might others fraudulently collect absentee votes in favor of Obama’s competitor, thereby derailing Obama? Or are you saying that it’s all a sham and whatever outcome we get will be suspect? Or did somebody else who had not yet read your column write that headline?

Fat Hand

Wrong problem: Obama will lose 2012 because of his failed policies across the board, not because of voter fraud.

Lukeisstupid

Political plague: Finally, someone else is paying attention! This is a plague and it is only getting worse. The political operatives, not the voters and certainly not the candidates, control who gets elected. Look at the number of absentee ballots and how they balloon, with each election bringing a new record. In 2009, former Hialeah Mayor Julio Robaina won with somewhere around 3,000 absentee ballots. In 2009, he tripled that. They seed first, reap later. They build public housing units instead of other facilities so they can create voting hubs that are later worked. Everyone knows this and still it goes on. It is time we involved the federal government. After all, it is the electoral process that is being corrupted here. Thank you, Uncle Luke, for taking this important subject to the greater masses. Now what?

Elaine de Valle

GOP machine: Luke is right. The GOP war machine cranks out absentee ballots to rural areas while trying to suppress in-person voting. It’s their election strategy just as sure as the GOP’s “Southern Strategy” is to use social issues to convince voters to support the wealthy to rob middle-class families.

Grant Stern

Democrats steal: If there were a crackdown on voter fraud, Obama would lose in a landslide. The only way Democrats can win is if they cheat.

Jon Carry

Guerrilla Gardening

The story about how Occupy Miami protestors are staying fed through urban gardens and donations (“Occupy Miami: Guerrilla Gardening and Extreme Healthful Cooking,” David Minsky, Dec. 1) shows a brilliant example of community, and how human beings should function. Screw the cops, there is no possible justifiable reason for them to run these people off. Any cop that gets hurt in this Occupy movement fully deserves it because they are the only ones who are provoking the trouble.

Abc123